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Advice to Young Men from an Old Man
1. Don’t pick on the weak. It’s immoral. Don’t antagonize the strong without
cause, its stupid.
2. Don’t hate women. It’s a waste of time
3. Invest in yourself. Material things come to those that have self actualized.
4. Get in a fistfight, even if you are going to lose.
5. As a former Marine, take it from me. Don’t join the military, unless you want
to risk getting your balls blown off to secure other people’s economic or
political interests.
6. If something has a direct benefit to an individual or a class of people, and
a theoretical, abstract, or amorphous benefit to everybody else, realize that
the proponent’s intentions are to benefit the former, not the latter, no matter
what bullshit they try to feed you.
7. Don’t be a Republican. They are self-dealing crooks with no sense of honor or
patriotism to their fellow citizens. If you must be a Republican, don’t be a
“conservative.” They are whining, bitching, complaining, simple-minded
self-righteous idiots who think they’re perpetual victims. Listen to talk radio
for a while, you’ll see what I mean.
8. Don’t take proffered advice without a critical analysis. 90% of all advice is
intended to benefit the proponent, not the recipient. Actually, the number is
probably closer to 97%, but I don’t want to come off as cynical.
9. You’ll spend your entire life listening to people tell you how much you owe
them. You don’t owe the vast majority of people shit.
10. Don’t undermine your fellow young men. Mentor the young men that come after
you. Society recognizes that you have the potential to be the most power force
in society. It scares them. Society does not find young men sympathetic. They
are afraid of you, both individually and collectively. Law enforcement’s primary
purpose is to suppress you.
11. As a young man, you’re on your own. Society divides and conquers. Unlike
women who have advocates looking out for them (NOW, Women’s Study Departments,
government, non-profit organizations, political advocacy groups) almost no one
is looking out for you.
12. Young men provide the genius and muscle by which our society thrives. Look
at the Silicone Valley. By in large, it was not old men or women that created
the revolution we live. Realize that society steals your contributions, secures
it with our intellectual property laws, and then takes credit and the rewards
where none is due.
13. Know that few people have your best interests at heart. Your mother does.
Your father probably does (if he stuck around). Your siblings are on your side.
Everybody else worries about themselves.
14. Don’t be afraid to tell people to “Fuck off” when need be. It is an
important skill to acquire. As they say, speak your piece, even if your voice
shakes.
15. Acquire empathy, good interpersonal skills, and confidence. Learn to read
body language and non-verbal communication. Don’t just concentrate on your
vocational or technical skills, or you’ll find your wife fucking somebody else.
16. Keep fit.
17. Don’t speak ill of your wife/girlfriend. Back her up against the world, even
if she’s wrong. She should know that you have her back. When she needs your
help, give it. She should know that you’ll take her part.
18. Don’t cheat on your wife/girlfriend. If you must cheat, don’t humiliate her.
Don’t risk having your transgressions come back to her or her friends. Don’t do
it where you live. Don’t do it with people in your social circle. Don’t shit in
your own back yard.
19. If your girlfriend doesn’t make you feel good about yourself and bring joy
to your life, fire her. That’s what girlfriends are for.
20. Don’t bother with “emotional affairs.” They are just a vehicle for women to
flirt and have someone make them feel good about themselves. That’s the part of
a relationship they want. For you it is a lot of work and investment in time. If
they are having an emotional affair with you, they’re probably fucking someone
else.
21. Becoming a woman’s friend and confidant is not going to get you into an
intimate relationship. If you haven’t gotten the girl within a reasonably short
period of time, chances are you won’t ever get her. She’ll end up confiding to
you about the sexual adventures she’s having with someone else.
22. Have and nurture friendships with women.
23. Realize that love is a numbers game. Guys fall in love easily. You’re going
to see some girl and feel like you’ll die if you don’t get her. If she rejects
you, move on to the next one. It’s her loss.
24. Don’t be an internet troll. Got out and live life. There is not a cadre of
beautiful women advertising on Craigslist to have NSA sex with you. Beautiful
women don’t need to advertise. The websites that advertise with attractive
women’s photos and claims of loneliness are baloney. All they want is your money
and your personal information so that they can market to you. The posts on
Craigslist by young “women” seeking NSA sex, and asking for a picture are just a
bunch of gay troll pic collectors. This is especially true if the post uses
common gay lexicon like “hole” as in “fuck my hole” or seeks “masculine” men, or
uses the word cock (except in the context of “Don’t send a cock shot.”) There
are women on Craigslist. They are easily recognizable by their 2-5 paragraph
postings. Most are in their 30's or older.
25. When you become a man in full, know that people will get in your way. People
who are attracted to you will somehow manage to step in your path. Gay guys will
give you “the look.” Old people will somehow stumble in front of you at the
worst time. Don’t get frustrated. Just step aside and go about your business.
Know that these are passive aggressive methods to get you to acknowledge their
existence.
26. Don’t gay bash. Don’t mentally or physically abuse people because of who
they are, or how they present themselves. It’s none of your business to try to
intimidate people into conformity.
27. If your gay, admit it to yourself, your parents, your friends and society at
large. Be prepared to get harassed. See rule 14. If someone threatens you or
assaults you, call the cops. Have them arrested. You have no obligation to self
sacrifice because of who you are. As a gay person, you’ll have more social
freedom than straight men. Use it to protect yourself. Be prepared to get out of
Dodge if your orientation makes your life unbearable. Move to San Francisco, New
York, Atlanta, or New Orleans. You’ll find a welcoming community there.
28. Don’t be a poser. Avoid being one of those dudes who puts a surfboard on top
of their car, but never surfs, or a dude with a powder coated fixed gear bike
and a messenger bag, but was never a messenger. Live the life. Earn your bona
fides.
29. Don’t believe the crap about the patriarchy. More women are accepted and
attend college. More degrees are awarded to women than men. Women outlive men.
More men commit suicide. Men are twice as likely to be victims of violence,
including murder. If you consider sexual assaults in prisons, twice as many men
are raped as women (society thinks prison rape is funny). The streets are
littered with homeless men, sprinkled with a few homeless women. Statically,
women are happier than men. The myth that girls are being cheated by are
educational system is belied by the fact that schools are bastions of
femininity, mostly run by and taught by women. Girls outperform boys in school.
It is the boys in school getting fucked over, and prescribed ritalin for being
boys. Real wages for men are falling, while real wages for women are rising.
Just because someone says something enough times, doesn’t make it true. You have
nothing to feel guilty about.
30. Remember, 97% of all advice is worthless. Take what you can use, and trash
the rest.